Resilience Isn’t Sexy — It’s Repetitive

Resilience through Repetition

You know what nobody tells you about resilience?It can be boring as hell.

We love to picture grand comebacks—the pretty phoenix, the dramatic soundtrack, the champagne toast. But true resilience? It’s usually quiet, repetitive, and sometimes painfully unglamorous.

It’s waking up, brushing your hair, and deciding again not to give up on the version of you that still believes.

Resilience, or better saying, “the art of becoming resilient,” can be messy and frustrating. It’s not marked by fireworks or toasts with expensive champagne—it’s marked by quiet moments of exquisite, repetitive effort to become as close to your ideal self as possible.

It’s waking up deciding if it’s time to give up on the idea of becoming the person you once dreamed of being — or to try one more time, even when all you want is to stay horizontal, watching vampire shows on Netflix.

Resilience is the art of not giving up, even when your world seems to be collapsing—but inside, an uncontainable flame of victory keeps burning, incessantly and relentlessly... You know that if you take no action, that flame will eventually consume you from within and burn all you had left inside.

I used to think I was fierce and fearless because I could survive chaos—heartbreak, grief, job loss, $65K debt, all the plot twists.But truly… resilience is surviving peace.

It’s staying consistent when there’s no crisis to fight. It’s persisting in taking the first step toward your goal even when your faith is shaky. It is taking the first step as small as it may seem to the world you live in and finding faith while going through it—while building.

And how many times will you keep taking the “same first step”?

As many times as it takes for your body to respond to YOUR COMMAND.

Once your brain acts in coherence with your heart’s desire, your body follows.

Action becomes an integrated response—a natural expression of who you are.

Because resilience is endurance with direction. It’s your north. It’s you.

building resilience is possible

Neuroscience and psychology show that resilience isn’t fixed—it’s trained.

To move from a state of resilience (bouncing back) to a trait of resilience (staying grounded, mastering the capacity of being resilient) takes one thing: repetition.

It requires us to make enduring behavioral changes. Trait resilience is built by repetition—using daily techniques, rituals, and habits until they become an integrated part of your being. When you reach this point, resilience isn’t a painful effort anymore—it’s a habit that your brain incorporates.

These small, boring acts you repeat daily—your walk, your breathwork, your journaling—literally rewire your brain.

These small and repetitive daily actions and the habits acquired through them even help on a biological level. My professor, Dr Tara Swart, demonstrated how much routine practice literally strengthens your nervous system, gives you authority and autonomy over your actions, and increases your capacity to handle stress without shaking your whole entire world and crumbling. 

You become a sole proprietor of your decisions and the way you respond to external stimuli and situations.

By doing the same small positive thing every single day—whether it's a walk, writing in your journal, meditating or doing something you consider positive for your well-being—you condition your mind and body to find safety and stability in these processes. Over time this signals to your body that it’s okay to get out of the “fire or flight” mode. You keep doing the small things daily until your brain perceives and believes that you are safe again.

Really—no miraculous formulas or chantings—just you getting to know yourself deeper, taking one tiny healing action at a time and repeating it.

Being patient and kind to yourself is crucial here. Looking at yourself in the mirror and just contemplating how well you're doing today compared to yesterday is not a small action at all—it ‘s so powerful that most can’t even imagine. Some days it’ll feel icky as you are not yet seeing the full road ahead of you, but taking a pause to observe the small victories is where you silently build YOUR resilience.

It is important for me to say that depending on the journey you are on, a simple act of getting out of bed to brush your teeth can feel as daunting as running a marathon without ever training for a half marathon. From my own experience, when you are battling a moment of depression, heartbreak or grief, every small effort feels like carrying a giant 20-pounds bag of sand through a 100,000 miles—only to drop it back at the beach.

It feels like you are running in circles because all you focus on is the state of loss (any kind of loss). You are not strong enough to perceive the small wins. That’s when you must persist in doing your practises. The more you do, the faster you calm your state, ground yourself back to the reality of the world you want to live in.

🧠 Consistency Over Boring Habits

Our brain is so used to instant gratification, especially in our new and digital world, when one message, “like” or mention makes us smile. Small wins and habits build-up are considered extremely boring and useless to us... until we fall hard.

Understanding that consistency is key, think about the day-to-day life of high performance athletes. Behind that majestic goal, touchdown, ten-point win lives a million of quiet and boring reps—a thousand of trial and errors, that nobody applauds. We only see what’s out there, mainly on Social Media or TVs. We rarely see the behind-the-scenes of these athletes: the blisters on their feet, the blood, the moments of extreme anger and frustration. We see what the media wants us to see- we see—what is sellable—and I can guarantee that “vulnerability” is not on their menu as it’s considered a sign of weakness–specially on men.

Boring is powerful because it is sustainable. It’s showing up and doing what you said you would. Once you master the boring reps , it becomes your superpower. And when you feel powerful—you are invincible. Trust me on this one ;)

People who knows me—the real and raw me—knows how much intensity I have within me. And yes, I am intense, but long ago i learned how tame my intensity by applying a focusing intention to it. Don’t get me wrong—you can be intense. Of course you can. But first, you must master the boring reps.

Only then, not only you are acting with confidence on everything that you do, but you are sure that if something goes south, you can get right back to where you started and do it again—with a smile on you face.

Yes–so finally answering all of you who have asked me so many times: “How do you keep a smile on your face regardless of the situation you're going through?" Here’s your answer: I am a master of boring and repetitive actions.

No, I am not perfect, I am only human (one could say!). But every single time I question myself, my actions, choices and decisions, it is not for fear—it is only to make sure I’ve stopped, calmed my state, and then started again.

Humor as a Healing Tool in Heavy Times

Heavy topics like trauma and loss don’t always need solemnity. A bit of humor can be medicine. In fact, a bit of humor can be a powerful ally in this journey. Studies have shown that humor can “build resilience” by helping us process pain and gain perspective on our struggles. Laughter calms the nervous system. 

I always choose to watch a silly comedy or scroll through dog and cat accounts on Instagram when I feel a hint of anxiety approaching. Laughter releases endorphins, reduces cortisol, and brings your body back to a calmer state.

The ability to face life with a dash of humor is 100% a form of resilience and being resilient. Again—You taught your body that all is okay.

It’s one thing to be resilient in chaos—when life forces you to react and adapt. Some of us actually excel in emergency mode, powered by adrenaline and urgency. But what happens when the crisis passes?

An often overlooked facet of resilience is the ability to thrive in calm, stable times without creating a new crisis. As the saying goes: “I used to think I was fearless because I could survive chaos... But true resilience? It’s surviving peace.”

It may sound counterintuitive, but peace can feel uncomfortable if you’re used to living in turmoil. Research on trauma explains that if your nervous system spent years in fight-or-flight mode, it becomes wired to expect high alert as the norm.

Some survivors of chaotic environments (AKA, “me” in March 2025 after leaving an extremely emotionally unhealthy relationship)  find themselves asking: “Now that things are stable, who am I? What should I do? Where do I start?”

Me?–I finally decided to bring Zyrena™ to life. My mind and my state were finally steady and calm—and I knew nothing and no one could stop me any longer.

The work of resilience here is learning to tolerate and embrace that stability without needing a fire to put out. True resilience is learning to live without waiting for chaos to validate your strength.

CONCLUSION

You want the secret?

Boring is holy. Repetition is power.

So today, instead of looking for a “breakthrough,” do your rep. 

Whatever your rep is — your walk, your call, your breath, your email, your salad, your prayer. 

Then do it again tomorrow.

Because you don’t need a miracle.

You just need one more rep.

Welcome to Zyrena Resets — the unsexy art of rising again.

To timing ▴ wiring ▴ will,

 — Dani